November is national adoption month, so I’m going to share what I’ve been working towards for the last year. Some of you already know, some have guessed and some are going to – hopefully – be excited for me. 🙂
I made the decision about a year ago, after MUCH though and prayer to move forward with the Foster to adopt program with Red Deer CFSA. I have never been married and I thought waiting for a husband to "start" my family was my only option. Then I discovered you could adopt as a single person. I have wanted to adopt and foster most of my life. In fact, if I go back to my first bible, given by my sister in law almost 15 years ago I know I’ll find a note that lists my prayer requests, and that on that list is a spouse who is willing to take that journey with me.
Over the last few years I have come to see that never being a wife is something I can live with, and live very happily, but never being Mom is not. There are so many children who need mom’s and I already am one. I just don’t have my child in my arms yet.
My adoption through CFSA is not a certainty, and I’m not officially approved yet, but I am fairly certain that approval is imminent. (My home study has recommended approval, and CFSA will most often follow suit)
I have found so many success stories and friends who have already taken this journey and I am certain of this decision. I have the full support of my family, my friends and my employer. In fact my employers are almost as excited as I and my family are. 🙂 I know this is not going to be easy and though I’m incredibly excited and can’t wait to meet my child, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified. Terrified I won’t be enough, that I’ll be a terrible parent, that single parenting will be too hard, that I will have failed my child because I am simply not enough alone. Those fears are real, but they’re not going to stop me, because in my heart I know I will be. That the worrying itself means I will be better at it than I think.
So, the waiting continues and the anticipation builds.
(picture is NOT of my future daughter, but of a special little girl who was adopted)